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Nursing another baby directly?

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Nursing another baby directly?

Post by mel chris on Sat Apr 24, 2010 8:51 pm

Hi, the thought of donating milk has been on my mind for awhile and I finally joined this site. I'm curious if any donors have actually nursed a baby directly?

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Re: Nursing another baby directly?

Post by Jaz on Sun Apr 25, 2010 8:31 am

I would expect that is out of the comfort zone of many, if not most recipient parents to have their child nursed by another woman. It's a whole lot more intimate and personal. I don't think I would mind nursing another's baby but I would never offer lest I offend or make my recipient feel (more?) inadequate. It might underline the reasons that the recipient is seeking milk and the emotions associated with that. I know personally how if feels to have an inadequate supply and it's painful and devastating. Even once I came to terms with it and realized bottom line that the most important thing was my kid got the nutrition he needed, it still hurt. I still feel sad that I wasn't able to do this for my kid and he's three. And that's even now, having successfully nursed his sibling to age 1 and donated thousands of ounces in addition.

I might be projecting a bit but it's still a very personal and intimate thing to offer and I think it could be fraught with pitfalls. YMMV.
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Re: Nursing another baby directly?

Post by mel chris on Sun Apr 25, 2010 10:17 am

I understand that, I was just curious if anyone had actually done it after seeing posts on another board where someone was asking if anyone would nurse another baby and seeing that a few people had done it and how much it meant to the people who couldn't nurse. Smile (Although there were many who said they'd feel uncomfortable about it, too, which is totally understandable.) It might feel a bit strange to offer! Thanks for your thoughts Smile

Hugs! I do know what it is like to struggle with a low supply since I had to supplement for my son before he was a year old (though not what it's like to struggle with a low or non-existent supply from the beginning.)

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Re: Nursing another baby directly?

Post by Jodibug on Sun Apr 25, 2010 7:53 pm

As a recipient mom I wouldn't be made to feel more inadequate if another mom nursed my LO. I know it is a more intimate thing to do than just feed my LO pumped milk, but if another mom were offering her milk, I'd take it in whatever form she cared to share it with me. In fact, there was a mom who posted that she had dairy free milk (what I need) available in my state but that she did not do well pumping and could only offer her milk at the breast. I was mighty disappointed that she didn't live near enough for me to take advantage of her offer.

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Re: Nursing another baby directly?

Post by ftlmom on Tue Apr 27, 2010 6:42 pm

Also a recipient, I would be honored if a mom offered to nurse my child. We have been fortunate enough to have several donors and 2 of them did nurse my little boy on different occasions. Once when one of the donors came over my house to drop of some milk I was having a gard time with my little guy. I asked her if she would hold him for me while I put the mmilk away. As she held my screeming child she quickly became moved with compassion for him and she asked me if it was ok to nursed him. I was so relieved by her offer. I said yes, please do, and she did. My son dranked his fill and was satisfied and happy. I was so greatful. I was not offended at all, my baby was already recieving her milk it really was no different to me.

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Re: Nursing another baby directly?

Post by bhtimm on Tue Apr 27, 2010 8:54 pm

Personally, as a recipient, I have mixed feelings. I certainly wouldn't mind if my baby got what she needed "straight from the tap". That, after all is the healthiest way to get the milk. (free from contamination, freshest possible state). I am thankful that I can use the milk in an at-breast supplementer and enjoy the nursing relationship with the donated milk fed at my own breast. My mixed feelings stem from there - the intimacy that the nursing couple enjoys. I would sort of feel like our nursing relationship is being "encroached on". I feel vulnerable enough as it is not being able to supply much more thant 20-25% of my baby's nutrition. That is just my feelings on the issue.

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Re: Nursing another baby directly?

Post by mel chris on Wed Apr 28, 2010 6:14 am

Thanks for all the responses! I have mixed feelings about it, too. I think I might be open to doing it but wouldn't know how to offer especially because some folks would be uncomfortable about it and I wouldn't want to pain them. And others would be thankful, but not sure how to ask. Hmm... lots to think about.

To me, (for me) it just seems like in some ways it might be easier to donate milk by nursing directly. I don't pump - I hand express when I am able to and have been doing so in case I ever need the milk for my youngest (but haven't needed it yet.) I have a lot of extra milk at the moment and am busy tandem nursing my LO's and trying to night wean my oldest, so nursing one other little one from time to time while I have a good supply wouldn't be much for me to add. But yes, it is a very intimate thing, so totally understandable why a lot of folks would be uncomfortable about it or have mixed feelings and am not totally sure how I feel about it myself. I definitely wouldn't do it just casually or without permission. Just something I was wondering about.

ftlmom - I am curious, how old was your son when he was nursed? I was also curious about the latching aspect, like if they don't nurse in awhile, are they able to latch on easily, or does that depend on the baby?

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Re: Nursing another baby directly?

Post by laura_mae99 on Sun May 09, 2010 12:28 pm

as a mom that donated... i would be open to the idea and willing to wet nurse. It wouldn't matter to me much at all, as either way i would be donating and help the family. But none of my families have ever asked but then again i never came out and asked them. i would be afraid i would hurt there feeling a guess coming out and asking, as i would only want to be helping and not making them feel funny or werid. As i could see how some moms would think that was a little more then what they are open to...
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Re: Nursing another baby directly?

Post by ftlmom on Wed May 12, 2010 3:16 pm

mel chris, my son is 7 months old, The 1st time he nursed from someone else he was around 2 1/2 months old. we are still enjoying our nursing relationship and do not plan to stop anytime soon. we have not recieved donor milk in the past 2 months and we have been supplementing with formula, about 6oz a day. His latch is great and always has been. He is adopted so I didn't get to him until he was 4 days old. We've been nursing ever since.

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Re: Nursing another baby directly?

Post by lucysmommy on Thu Jun 17, 2010 4:57 pm

I would love to be a wet nurse! I have heard wet nurses in "the old days" could nurse around 7 children! I DONT want to go that far, but am totally open to the idea.
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Re: Nursing another baby directly?

Post by Madimommy on Wed Jun 23, 2010 10:56 pm

I would almost rather do this than pump... even if only on a part time basis.

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Re: Nursing another baby directly?

Post by somewhatsinglemama on Sun Jun 27, 2010 7:24 pm

Well this is odd to post as a recipient mom b/c usually I am the donor.

But two weeks ago I was in the hospital for emergency surgery and my sweet 8 month old will not take a bottle and I could not feed her. So I sent out an urgent text to all of my nursing friends asking for someone to come and feed my baby.

An amazing woman immediately volunteered I love her for it. My baby loves her for it!

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Re: Nursing another baby directly?

Post by Threejoys on Mon Jun 28, 2010 4:55 pm

I have been thinking about wet nursing ever since I donated. I think it would be a wonderfully rewarding experience. However, even after some thorough online research I can't seem to find anything on modern day wet nursing. It's kind of sad that it's not more sought after.

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Re: Nursing another baby directly?

Post by OLeaozinho on Sat Jul 17, 2010 10:07 pm

I don't respond well to a pump unless I'm very engorged, so if someone wanted me to do this I would do it.

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Re: Nursing another baby directly?

Post by dietpepsigal on Mon Jul 19, 2010 7:31 pm

I have twins and they are 14mo, I have never successfully nursed. I still remember the 2 episodes whre my son actually latched. But with numerous consultants - we never did get to that stage. I have exclusively pumped and bottle fed all this time. I keep wondering how it would feel to nurse a real baby, and while I would not want to do this on a regular basis, It did enter my mind that I would like to try it once or twice. Compared to pumping, it must be amazing. Unsure of the hygenic effects though.

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Re: Nursing another baby directly?

Post by Courtney on Mon Nov 22, 2010 9:31 pm

A friend, whose 3m old son I babysit, and I have chatted about MilkShare and Eats on Feets and how awesome it is that there are communities like this now, and the whole wetnurse thing. And while I don't think I'd bring it up, I would be perfectly open to nursing him while he's here (just 3-4 hours 2x a week). Not necessarily a regular thing, but say he ran out of milk here or she didn't pump enough, etc.

I have heard of a few friends who nursed each others babies regularly, like while trading off babysitting, etc. I think that's awesome!!

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Re: Nursing another baby directly?

Post by april92399 on Wed Jun 08, 2011 12:27 pm

I attempted to wet nurse a recipient baby, but she was so used to the bottle that she wouldn't take my boob Sad

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Re: Nursing another baby directly?

Post by Feb2011Mom on Wed Jun 08, 2011 12:47 pm

Unless you live close to the recipient baby, how are you going to wet-nurse? As wonderful as the idea seems, I just do not think it will be practical for a working mom like me.....unless the family live close enough and unless the donor and recipient families are close enough to bring up this topic.

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Re: Nursing another baby directly?

Post by april92399 on Wed Jun 08, 2011 6:26 pm

I brought it up in the very beginning when I stated what I had to offer. I just threw nursing directly in there too. It isn't something that I think can be a regular thing in this day and age where society is GO GO GO, you know? Everything is fast in todays world and there is simply no time to incorporate someone else's baby into your life with your own baby, to nurse directly. But even once gives that baby antibodies that would have otherwise been weakened by air and temperature, etc. Smile

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